LETTER LACED WITH HATER-ADE

I just drank a bottle of Hater-ade, and decided to write this public letter to Beyonce Knowles regarding her song, "Ave Maria," which is on her latest album – I Am…Sasha Fierce.

Dearest Sasha Fierce,

I hate to break it to you, but your "Ave Maria" song is probably one of the dumbest songs that I have ever heard. It doesn’t even make sense.

Sasha, do you even know what “Ave Maria” means? From the lyrics of your song, it seems like you’re turning the phrase into a mantra for “exhaling.” Do you need to exhale? Whitney already did that, boo. Dig out the soundtrack from under all of your own CDs (unless your dad threw it away, which wouldn’t be surprising). Do you need to find the voice within? Christina already did that. Go find that CD, too, while you’re at it.

You may need to talk to someone about your complex. You’re now comparing yourself to Mary, the Mother of Jesus. Umm, no. Beyonce does not equal "Ave Maria." Neither does "Sasha Fierce."

I’m not gonna lie… the music itself is beautiful, and you sing it beautifully. But after all is said and done, you are still singing “Ave Maria,” but not really. I just hope you haven’t run out of ideas that you had to make up your own version of “Ave Maria” without really thinking it through. I mean we get it, B. You are so over-exposed that we get it. But “Ave Maria?”

Come on now! You know better than that, girl! Who do you think you are? Solange?

Frenemies,

W.