JOLLY FOR JOLLIBEE (...right)

I got a very random text (from one of my boyz at work) last night, and it rattled me a little at first. But when I finally “got it” I was literally on the floor, ready to laugh out my liver. This is exactly how the text went:

“That’s so cool that you are at Jollibee right now. What’s that? You’re not? Oh that’s right, I’m at Jollibee. Not you. Thanks for asking tho”

At first I was like, “WHAT THE EFF?!” And then when I realized what was going on, I totally laughed, but had to ask myself “What the hell is TJ doing at Jollibee?!” TJ, you see, is one of my boyz from the office. And the extra-cool thing is that he is from the hood! He is a home-grown white boy from PG County. Yes, I said it – “PG COUNTY.” Yes, we be lunchin’… we be talkin’ about go-go… we be reminiscin’ about our stories from the Beltway… and we both went to the “OG” science and tech high schools from around the way (Roosevelt and Oxon Hill). So on many levels, this guy is a straight-up homey. And he went to Jollibee last night. WTF?!

Mel, TJ’s girlfriend, lives close to the Jollibee that’s on Beverly –somewhere near K-Town and the sprinkling of Philippine-owned businesses in that part of Los Angeles. In their quest for food last night, they decided to drive around – and when they saw Jollibee, a light bulb flickered in Mel’s head. I, along with the dusting of other Filipinos in the office, have had discussions with TJ (and the rest of the gang) about J-bee, and from the sounds of it – the lil’ spot has piqued their curiosities every once in a while (like when they’d drive by). But last night was the night, and TJ and Mel took the plunge into the rabbit-hole leading to Philippine fast-food land. Emm.

So this morning, TJ brings over a menu (which he ganked), and tells me about his little adventure. He and Mel came super close to ordering the Palabok Fiesta (which, for you non-knowers, is a Philippine noodle dish of cornstarch bihon noodles, and a garlic-flavored sauce topped with pork strips, crunchy pork cracklings, bay shrimps, scallions, and hard boiled egg slices; total YUM for native eaters, but a bit on the scarier side for others). Instead they opted for safer choices: TJ went with the Yumburger w/TLC (uh, that’s Tomato, Lettuce, and Cheese – LOL) meal, and Mel took a more daring approach and got the Amazing Aloha (burger with bacon, lettuce, cheese and a juicy pineapple) meal. TJ wasn’t feelin’ the Yumburger, but he said that the fries AND Mel’s Amazing Aloha burger were actually yu-hummm. So their foray into Pinoy Fast Food-ology was not a complete waste. (HA.)

For those who don’t know, Jollibee started out as an ice cream parlor back in the Philippines (circa 1975-ish), but incorporated an array of food items in/around 1978. It has easily become the country’s home-grown rival to McDonald’s, and has since made a name for itself in and out of the islands. Like other Philippine fast food chains, it specializes in “quickly-made” food (burgers, fries, etc.), and also offers native meals as well: palabok, Philippine spaghetti (sweeter than Italian spaghetti, and with hot dog slices), fried chicken, and breakfast meals complete with hot dogs, bacon, tapa or tocino, garlic rice and eggs. For dessert, simple offerings such as pandan and/or ube flavored shakes (with tapioca pearls/boba), peach mango pies, and even halo-halo are available.

Lucky for us on the West, Jollibees dot the coast and can be found in/around major metropolitan areas such as Los Angeles, San Diego, and the Bay Area. So when the hankering for the tastes of the Motha'land comes, the stuff is within reach. And, coming soon, a branch is slated to open in Queens, NY later this year. The world-over, however, there are over 600 “langhap-sarap” destinations. (HAHAHA! Langhap-sarap. Oh, man.)

You’re totally enlightened, I know it.